在我高中的最后一年,我们的语文老师为了让我们能考个好成绩。给我们每人都发了一个练习本。这个本子是自己印的,有几十页,一面是考试要用到的字词和古诗填空,一面是方格子,让我们练习作文。偶尔还会收上去,检查我们的练习情况。我记得这是我当时为数不多的乐趣了。要知道,枯燥的早晚自习要是睡觉和看小说,会有很大的风险,因为有老师会偷偷地在窗户外面瞄你。跟同桌聊天,还会影响周围好学生的学习。虽然我们最后一排都是成绩不太好的,但大家心里其实也都是想考好的,这是非不愿实乃不能的事情。有句话说:不想当将军的厨师不是好司机。大家心里肯定都是想做第一名,为班级争光的,毕竟经常被老师说拖后腿不是一个好的行为。所以我们都是好学生。好学生自己不学习,但不会影响别人学习的。

    于是我一到早晚自习,就开始爬格子,拼了命地要填满它。那段时间我对一切事物都特别在意,上课观察谁谁谁在做小动作不用心听讲,下课就飞奔到操场,占个好位置,顺着跑道看着一大波人慢慢地涌了进来,再在铃声中潮水般散去。可惜的是那时候我没能联想到植物大战僵尸。大家都知道,那时候的生活是很重复的,我们每天几乎在同一个时间起床,上课,下课,吃饭,睡觉。实在没什么东西好写。于是我开始打起了梦的主意。我在每个晚上要么胡思乱想,要么打着手电筒在被窝里看小说,总之就拼命让大脑忙碌起来,这样做梦会丰富点。

要知道,做梦其实是一件很有技术含量的事情。首先,不能太平淡,因为这样早上你会什么也记不得。但也不能是噩梦,那样会很疲惫,经常这样,会让你没有精力去应付漫长的白天。所以梦要有跌宕的情节和曲折的剧情。但这样还是不够的。你还要学会在梦里提醒自己,要让自己有引导故事的能力。比如,你梦里摔下了悬崖,这时候你要告诉自己,你会飞,成绩好的同学也许要喊i can fly才会有用。反正不管用什么语言,你得让自己飞起来,这样梦才不会在你粉身碎骨之后的一身冷汗中醒来,才能继续下去。其次呢,你要把握好时间,梦里时间虽然可以无限延长,但现实中的时间不等人。你要学会控制自己在合适的时候醒来。太早的话,你睁开眼睛看到繁星漫天,一束月光从窗子里透到你脸上,勾起你的思乡之情,会让你很长时间不能入睡,浪费时间。太晚的话,你会被室友的闹铃所惊醒,情节的发展不能如你所愿。所以你要注意。最后呢,也是最关键的一点,就是醒来后你千万不要说话。脑子里要先回味一遍,这时候就算被上铺下来踩到了也不能吭声。然后飞快的洗漱,尽量让水少冲走一点大脑里的记忆,赶紧冲进教室,在小本子上记录下来。虽然即使这样,最后留下的也只有十之一二,但也足以撑过大半个自习了。
    

我很快的写完了一个本子,特别期望老师会再发一本,但一直没有。我很失望,但我也因此对这个语文老师颇有印象。熟悉我的人都知道,我记性特别不好。常常忘记老同学。我想这可能跟高中的时候班里人数太多有关。我有个坏毛病,就是做事之前要先做好最坏打算,老给自己打退堂鼓。比如我一看班里一百多个同学,心里会想,这要记住任务量太大了,于是就变得不在意起来,到最后也就真没记住。记英语单词就是这样。从来都是A开头的几个,后面的只能望洋兴叹。
    

我们继续说语文老师。我只记得这个仁兄个子很高,但是头发短短的,胡子短短的,说话也抑扬顿挫的。给人一种距离感,这样好处是会使你觉得他很厉害。人对神秘的东西总怀有一种敬畏的态度。我最后发展成了因为敬畏然后才觉得神秘。因此我觉得所有的老师都很神秘,毕竟我没有好的成绩来作为跟他们接近的理由。我一直觉得老师不在于教书好坏,只有两种,一种是好成绩学生的老师,一种是坏成绩学生的老师。如果你能对两者都保持一个态度,那么你就是好老师。
    

我能记得的另一位语文老师是个女的。倒不是她漂亮,而是她曾经表扬过我。自高中以后,我就没受过多少表扬,所以印象很深。我记得那次作文让写自传。这让我很为难。我是一个不爱谈论自己的人,况且我一直觉得自传都是要死的人在回味自己一生的时候才产生的东西。在高中的时候那么小,写出来也就是一个自我介绍。但是800字的自我介绍又很不容易。我记得开始写800字的作文很为难,写一段数一下字数,小心翼翼生怕漏掉一个可以充字数的标点符号,我喜欢用省略号的习惯就是从那时候开始养成的,现在不需要充字数了就改成了波浪号。

我为作文苦恼了很长的时间,直到有一天,也不知道怎么回事,我突然觉得作文有话说了。就跟武侠小说里打通了任督二脉一样。如果你熟悉我写的东西,你会发现“打通了任督二脉”这样的词经常出现。不是我在向你炫耀我看过的武侠小说多,而是我越来越发现许多事情总是这样突然地发生变化。比如你喜欢一个人,不能在一起,日日思念,不能相忘。但是突然有一天,你发现你忘了,然后就从此再也不喜欢了。这中间的过程快得好像你不知道什么时候长出来第一颗牙齿,总觉得似乎一下子就不一样了。我就是这样。不知道哪一天作文课上,我忽然发现作文有话说了。我很高兴,在一次作文里写了好几页。这可苦了我的同学。因为那时候老师让我们互相批改作文。别人都是很快的改完去学习了,他还在翻。而且主要的还要写评语。大家都知道那时候作文评语都是从立意、语言、中心思想等几个方面的写起。但是我的作文里都是废话,这让你摸不清中心思想。说实话,连我也不清楚自己什么意图,何况别人。这让每一个改我作文的人都很为难,为此常常向我抱怨。于是我就不敢在作文上乱写。而且最重要的是如果你每次都写太多,作文本很快就会用完,写完了要自己买,这很费钱。

于是那次作文,我用了文言文书写。这样既有话说,还省字数。而且古人的诗句什么的可以直接拿来用,显得很有水平。然后老师就在班上念了我的作文。虽然她没有提我的名字,同学们都不知道是表扬的是谁,但我仍然很感激。感激之余,我觉得要回报她。我就是这样的人,不愿意亏欠别人。于是我决定,要语文考试拿一次高分。

    语文得第一,想的容易,实施起来很困难。因为那时候语文有阅读和作文,这都是主观题。主观题的意思就是老师爱给你多少分就给你多少分。我努力了很多次,慢慢地发现我弱项是作文。因为作文的60分我都是40分,这样就不能考130了。要知道语文不考130分以上不能算是好成绩。作文40分是什么概念呢,就是你工整地书写800字,里面没有骂人的话或者不是抄的前面阅读的文章,哪怕你把作文题目分析一下,基本也都是40分。我还有次得了30多分。那次我作文写一个故事,讲的是几年后回老家与初中老友相见的场面。可能是老友太多,写着写着就发现地方不够用了,于是我就用小字写在卷子的空白处,最后用一个箭头指过去。这跟阅卷老师添了很大麻烦,所以对当时的分数我没有任何异议。我还很沾沾自喜,因为箭头指过去总比没有没有结尾要好。

在很长的一段时间里,我一度以为这是一个不能完成的任务了。但苍天有眼,有次作文得了52分,结果我考了一个130多分,总算还了夙愿。

448 对 “之一:语文”的想法;

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